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When is it too late to back out on a wedding?


Recently a famous professional athlete broke off an engagement two days before the wedding and in a radio interview someone asked me whether or not he should have gone through with it anyway.  Absolutely not!!  I don’t think it’s ever too late to back out on a wedding.  Is it wrong, hurtful and inappropriate? Yes, of course! But no one should get married when they know they don’t want to, even if they are standing on the altar.  Their spouse isn’t going to like the end result whether they called it off before the ceremony or after so why go through all of the drama and emotional cost of marrying someone you don’t want to marry to tell them immediately afterward that you didn’t want to marry them in the first place and that you want an annulment or a divorce?

Of course it’s totally irresponsible to call off a wedding after everything is planned, paid for, and friends and family have made travel plans to come to the wedding.  But most important and even worse is the emotional pain it will bring to your partner to believe all that time that they are going to spend the rest of their life with you only to find out two days before the big day that they are not.  But I still think you should be honest with your partner sooner than later.  Faking your way through a wedding ceremony is only going to cause you and your partner a lot of emotional pain and costly legal proceedings to end your relationship.  If you need to get out, do it.  But next time, pay more attention to the red flags and the signs that the marriage is not meant to be so that you can avoid this pain in the future.

If you end up standing alone at the alter or if your fiance calls off your wedding after it was already planned, I know it must feel like someone ripped your guts out and left you on the floor to die. You have a right to be mad, sad and confused because your partner should not have led you this far down the marriage road just to leave you there alone.  But you have to know that it’s better that the person told you now rather than after the ceremony.  Even though you can’t see what’s coming, it must be better than what you have right now, so be faithful that your situation will turn around and you will have an opportunity to find love again.

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