Dr.
Michelle stopped by TRL to give relationship advice to the studio audience
and viewers at home. She didn't have time to answer all of the
questions on the air so below are some more viewer questions and Dr.
Michelle's advice. Check out the video below:
Q:
I like this guy at school so much.
We get along great but he’s really shy. What’s the best way for a girl
to ask out a guy without coming across desperate? Caitlin, CA
A: Start by asking him to “hang out” with you. Say “hey
let’s check out this new movie” or say “let’s get some pizza after
school.” If he is your friend he won’t mind hanging out with you
anyway. If he likes you in a romantic way, when you are alone, he
will probably do something to let you know. If that doesn’t work,
you can ask him who he likes—you just have to say it in a easy-going way
like you are just curious, not like he better say you!
Q: I’ve got a good sense of style but I enjoy wearing loose
comfortable clothes. My good friend on the other hand wears lots of short
skirts and low cut tops and she always gets attention from the guys at
school. Do you think that my style is preventing be from finding a
guy? Tori, WA
A: There is a guy for every style so of course you will find a guy! If
you are looking for the horniest guys who’s main objective is trying to
get into your pants then the short skirts and the low tops is the best way
to get his attention. If you are looking for a relationship or a guy
who actually wants more than to hook up, then be yourself and the right
guy for you will be attracted to that. If you dress
up pretending to be someone you are not, you are going to attract
the wrong type of person for you and it won’t work out anyway.
Q: I’ve got a crush on my friend Mike. He’s always hugging me,
holding my hand and being affectionate. I’m scared to tell him how I
feel because I don’t want to ruin the friendship. Can you tell if
someone likes you based on their body language? Jessica, OH
A: It’s
very hard to tell from his body language alone. One the one hand, he
might definitely want to date you and yes he is doing those things to see
how you react and if you are interested. On the other hand he could
be doing them because he likes to flirt and be affectionate towards girls
because it’s fun and it feels good, not because he wants to be
exclusive. If that is the case, you coming on too strong could make
him pull back because he doesn’t want to ruin the friendship. If
you want to know if he is interested and you guys are friends, ask him who
he likes.
Q: I have major feelings for my best-friends ex-boyfriend. They broke
up a few months ago and I really like him. Would is be totally
unacceptable for me to date him? Michelle, TX
A: In a perfect world, those two are no longer dating so he should be fair
game. But in the real world, girls keep feelings for guys for a long
time and they usually expect the guy to be off-limits to her best friends.
If you want to keep your friendship with her, find someone else to
date (there are sooo many guys out there). Or if you just can’t
imagine leaving him alone, then ask her how she feels about it recognizing
that if she says don’t date him, and you date him anyway, your
friendship is over. (She might also tell you she is okay with it even
though she isn’t just to see if you will try to date him, and then she
still might get mad at you)
Q: I’m in high school and I’ve been dating a girl for a 2 years.
She’s awesome but I’m not in love with her anymore. I’m going to
tell her but dread loosing her friendship. Is it at all possible to
still be friends after a break up? Phillip, VA
A: Not
right away. She is not going to be happy about a break-up after two
years and if you guys continue to talk and see each other, that is going
to make it much harder for her to get over you and move on. Sticking
around will make it seem like you want to have your cake and eat it too.
If you really want to help her move on so that maybe at some point
you can be friends again, give her some space to get over you and when she
is ready you guys can talk again.
Q: My friend is always flirting with my boyfriend and it drives me
crazy. I don’t want to have a fight with her but I really need to say
something before I explode. What’s the best way to handle this? Nikki,
CO
A: Tell her now before you blow your top. Wait until a calm time
when you are alone with her and tell her exactly what things she does that
you feel like looks like flirting to you and why it bothers you. If
she tells you that she is not trying to flirt with him, you can tell her
that is fine, but that the things she is doing bother you (whether they
are flirting or not).
Q: My best friend really likes this guy but he has feelings for me. He
told me how he felt and I would love to go out with him. I don’t
want to upset my friend-what do I do?
A: Talk to her about it. Even if you decide to date him and she
doesn’t like it, you will have an opportunity to let her know what
happened and that you didn’t intentionally go after a guy you knew that
she liked. Even though she would be wrong to be mad because he is
fair game until one of you starts dating him, she still might feel upset
because she expects you to leave him alone and give her the first crack at
him.
Q: I know for a fact that my friend’s boyfriend has been cheating on
her. She is totally in love and going to be devastated when she finds out.
I’m scared to be the one to break the bad new. Help!! Catherine, KS
A: This one is really hard because different people respond differently.
If you don’t tell her and she eventually finds out that you knew,
she will probably be mad at you for not telling her. However, if you
do tell her, she might not believe you or she might fight with her
boyfriend and then get back together with him and be mad that you ever
told her because she believes she was happier not knowing. You have
to make the decision that YOU can live with.
Click here to read archives of the Ask Dr.
Michelle Column.
Dr.
Michelle
Ask Dr. Michelle